Help Teens Be Holiday Blessings

by Katherine O'Brien, Certified College Planning Specialist, Founder Celtic College Consultants

The holidays are a special time of the year. Thanksgiving, St. Nicholas Day, the Feast of the Immaculate Conception, Our Lady of Guadalupe, Christmas, and New Years. These special days bring various groups of people together, friends, co-workers, and extended family members. In addition to all the merry making, good food, and fun activities, most teens are silently suffering from anxiety as they wonder how they fit in. Teens (and some adults) wonder:

 

What do people need that my talent can provide? What can I do to help? How do I fit in, now that I am no longer a child?

 

They wonder how their gifts and talents, personalities and interests can become something, become useful in a meaningful way. One of the basic human desires is to be seen and acknowledged. Another is to be useful, to do something meaningful and lasting with one’s life.

 

Here are a few examples of how teens I have worked with have been able to connect their gifts with the needs of those around them:

One of my students, a gifted musician, uses her music to give people a respite from their daily lives. Seeing how stressed people in her life are, she invites them to sit with her and let go of their phones and burdens for a while. She listens carefully to them, joining them in whatever is going on in their lives. Also sensitive to the needs of the elderly in her community, she occasionally plays piano and sings at a local nursing home in order to help meet the people's needs for connection. Playing songs from their past, her audience members connect through memories to people they have known over the course of their lives. Playing songs of the season, she helps them celebrate the blessings of today, and brings the community together, connecting them with shared song and music.

 

Another of my female students has the gift of emotional sensitivity. She uses this in her peer counseling roles, drawing students into small groups or one on one discussions. She helps by listening, and by teaching various coping strategies. Just the fact that they are noticed and reached out to has helped break through the isolation her fellow students have felt, thinking they were the only one who was grieving or sad or lonely or afraid when, in fact, many people feel those things. It is not uncommon, for example, for high school students to experience the loss of one or more of their grandparents. This loss is significant. Not only have they lost someone who likely provided them affirmation and encouragement, a tie to their past, to the heritage of their family, to the stories and customs and traditions of their family has been lost. Life is never again the same after the death, or the birth, of a human being. It takes time to adjust to that change in our family and community.

 

A young man I worked with recently, used his own need for physical exercise in order to keep his mental health healthy to motivate him. Rather than sit inside and get depressed, he tapped his organizational skills during the pandemic lockdown. With help from his dad and a few friends, he modified his family’s garage into an open air weightlifting gym with the help of a group of friends. This same group was then able to come together and lift and exercise, thus meeting their social, physical, and mental health needs. His ingenuity, creativity, and leadership skills served his community well. He also gave encouragement to his friends, thus boosting everyone's moral during those difficult and uncertain days. Each of those young people, with their lower personal stress level and calmer demeanor was able to help support his or her family through the difficulties everyone faced during the months of lockdown.

 

Another young man I had the pleasure of working with throughout his high school years was extremely introverted. Finding opportunities to exercise his gifts and talents in ways he was comfortable with was challenging. One day, when we were talking, I noticed that his whole demeanor underwent a subtle change. He had been talking about making a particular dish for a family gathering. This dish was special to his family, and he had been taught how to make it by his grandmother. He was now the custodian of that part of his family’s patrimony. His quiet work in the kitchen was celebrated by the family when they gathered around the table. With my encouragement, he sought out a younger cousin and began to teach her the recipe and techniques needed to make this special dish, thus ensuring that this part of their family’s heritage would not be lost, since more than one of the grandchildren could carry it forward.

 

Please join me in helping teens use their gifts to bless others

 

When you meet with teens at holiday gatherings this month, how can you help them begin to recognize their talents and find ways to use them to meet the needs of the people in their lives? Be creative. Invite them to make their own unique contribution to your family and community.

 

One of the things you can do is invite them to meet with me. For 20 years I have guided teens through the process of getting to know and appreciate their own giftedness, then explore possible roles to begin to use those gifts now. These conversations blossom into considerations of post high school possibilities including trade school, community college certificate programs, as well as various programs and majors at college.

 

Katherine can be contacted by emailing: KOB@CelticCollegeConsultants.com

Who's on Your College Success Team?

Parents are key members of teens' support team. School counselors and teachers are also important. College Consultants like myself wear many hats. These are some of the hats I've been wearing for the past 20 years as I have worked with teens and their families.

Teen Life Coach

Goal Setting. Encouragement. Accountability Partner. Mentor. Coach through Failures and Difficulties. Teach Interpersonal Skills. Encourage Development of Strong Character Traits & Virtues

Academic Coach

Study Skills. Time Management. Task Prioritization. Organization. Foster Healthy Habit Formation.

Leadership Mentor

Identify Opportunities. Teach and Foster Leadership Skills. Troubleshoot Problems. Celebrate Growth.

College Admissions Specialist

Guide Life & College Goal Determination Process. Clarify & Guide College Selection Process. College Essay Writing Coaching & Editing. Application Preparation Management

College Funding Specialist

Identify Opportunities to Lower Costs. Advise on Saving Strategies. Scholarship Strategist. Financial Aid Maximization Coaching

Parent Coach

Stress Management. Effective Communication Facilitator. Subject Matter Expert. Sanity Stabilizer. Prayer Partner.

Want to explore bringing me onto your teen's college success team? Email me, Katherine O'Brien, at KOB@CelticCollegeConsultants.com and request a college prep consultation for your family.

Katherine O'Brien is a Certified College Planning Specialist and the Founder of Celtic College Consultants, an independent education consultancy serving families across the US since 2004. Her Class of 2015 - Class of 2024 College Success Program Clients have averaged nearly $250,000 each in scholarship offers and have headed to campus with goals, skills, and confidence.

What Kind of Person Does Your Teen Want to Be?

by Katherine O'Brien, ThD Candidate

Character is not a word heard around college admissions very often. How can I impress admissions? Is the top question in many students’ minds. Sadly, it is the wrong question. This is life, not a game. What matters is becoming a man or woman of good character, with defined goals, humility, and strength, strength that comes from reliance on God’s strength.

"Do not desire to be other than you are, but desire to be very well what you are."
- St. Francis de Sales

St. Francis de Sales was a bishop with a particular gift for guiding lay people on their journeys to holiness, to intimacy with God. Part of that journey is becoming yourself.

Teens are just starting this journey. This period of our lives, from 13-23, is so formative. NOW is the time to set goals, to define our character, to lay the foundation to become fully alive. It takes time to come to know one’s strengths and traits. As I work with underclassmen, this is my focus, to help each come to know themselves well, and to begin to take steps to develop their strengths, overcome their weaknesses, explore their interests, and come alive as the particular person he or she is.

"Good character is not formed in a week or a month. It is created little by little, day by day. Protracted and patient effort is needed to develop good character." Heraclitus of Ephesus

For a man who lived over 3,000 years ago, Heraclitus certainly hit the nail on the head. Neuroscientific research has confirmed this. The more we repeat thoughts and patterns, the more deeply they are ingrained in our brains. This is also true of our thoughts. What we hear, listen to, repeat to ourselves over and over and over is what we believe. That's why changing one's mind, creating a new habit, learning something new all take time and consistent effort. We are creating new pathways in our brains.

Here's an example of how this can be done. The Boy Scouts does an amazing, powerful thing and most Scouts have no idea that it's happening. Every single Scout learns the Scout law at the beginning of his or her Scouting journey.

A Scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent.

The Scout law is repeated at the beginning of every single meeting. Repetition doesn’t make the change happen. It does, however, plant the seeds, that these are traits worth having, that each Scout is there to develop.

There are many ways to inculcate character in teens. It’s worth being intentional about. I am, and have been for my entire career as a college consultant, with every single teen I’ve worked with. To learn more about my College Success Program, click here. To inquire about having me work with your teen, email me and request a consultation. KOB@CelticCollegeConsultants.com

Grant me, O Lord my God, a mind to know you, a heart to seek you, wisdom to find you, conduct pleasing to you, faithful perseverance in waiting for you, and a hope of finally embracing you. 
- Saint Thomas Aquinas

Know the Signs of College Preparedness

by Katherine O'Brien ThD Candidate, Certified College Planning Specialist, & Founder, Celtic College Consultants

 

There are signs that the water is rising and a river will overflow its banks. My friend, who has lived on a river for several years, had to learn those signs. Over the years, during our conversations, I hear occasional comments about the level of the river. This morning, after many storms this past week, I heard about having to move the benches away from the river bank. The river is expect to flood today, hopefully not all the way up to my friend's house. Even so, preparations have been made because the signs were known, watched for, and responded to.

 

 

Do you know the signs of college preparedness for your teen? Your family? Do you know what needs to happen and when it needs to happen so your teen is ready for college?

 

Campus Visits

As I spoke with a sophomore this week, we planned his second round of campus visits and how he and his parents can best prepare for them.

 

Course Selection

As I met with my 8th - 11th grade clients recently, we have discussed class schedules for next year, to meet the requirements of their top choice schools and programs, develop and show their interests, and show the level of academic challenge that they are capable of handling well.

 

College Funding

With the FAFSA changes, college funding strategies have changed. Have you refined your plans? Have you estimated your college costs and put together a cash flow strategy to meet them? Do you know your SAI?

 

Scholarships

College selection significantly influences scholarship eligibility. So does student preparedness. Hoping for scholarships is nowhere near as effective as planning for them. Do you know what types of scholarships might best contribute to your college funding plan? Is your student researching and applying to them? Considering that in college searches?

 

Life Skills

Life skills are sorely lacking in many young people, leading some to drop out of college, change their majors, transfer schools, and fail classes, all of which negatively impact their self-image and future prospects. Are you parenting in such a way that your teen is learning by steadily taking more responsibility, having opportunities to succeed, and to fail, while being mentored, rather than sheltered?

 

Leadership

One of my clients and I discussed his options for developing relationships with key teachers so they will know him well and be able to write top notch recommendations for him in a year. Demonstrating leadership, inside and outside the classroom not only helps teens become strong adults, it also boosts their sense of self, and enables key adults in their lives to get to know them, mentor them, then write strong recommendations for them.

 

 

These are a few of the signs of college preparedness. I invite you to increase your awareness of the signs. Schedule a family consultation with Katherine, a trained, seasoned professional with 20 years’ experience. Hear your teen discuss his or her accomplishments, ideas, hopes, and dreams. Ask your questions. Know what the signs are that you are track. Learn what next steps will move you and your teen toward college success. Be affirmed for the work you have done so far and mentored for continued progress. Email Katherine: KOB@CelticCollegeConsultants.com today to schedule your consultation so you know the signs of college preparedness and what the next right steps toward college success are for your family.